By Daisy Luther
A while back, I wrote an article called “30 Signs That You’re One of Those Crazy Preppers.” Lots of readers got into the spirit of things, since it was pretty darned relatable. We all know these are actually signs of sanity, but we’re used to being misunderstood by the unprepared and sometimes it’s fun to have a good laugh about their misconceptions of what we actually do.
Then Ebola happened, here on American soil, and a lot more people jumped on board the preparedness bandwagon. To welcome the newbies, here are 45 MORE signs that you might have crossed over to the “prepped side.” (Many of these came straight from the readers!)
Many of these will be things that non-preppers just can’t understand, but they’ll probably give you a warm glow. Feel the prepper solidarity!
- You spend your days off digging an underground bunker in your backyard.
- You have more than a thousand cheapo lighters that you purchased in bulk, stashed away in the back of your linen closet. Oh…and you don’t even smoke.
- You eat a lot of ‘survival food’ now, so there is no ‘system shock’ when you are forced to eat only the items you have stocked (or that you GROW – hint hint).
- You stock alcohol in mass quantities so you can stay drunk after the SHTF.
- You stock alcohol in mass quantities – and you don’t even drink. (Barter, baby!)
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- You know what? Forget stocking alcohol. You have your own still. You’ll make alcohol.
- You have enough salt to create another Dead Sea.
- You have a forest’s worth of firewood cut, stacked, and seasoned.
- You purchased 50 of these already for stocking stuffers for your friends/family/workmates/neighbor/random stranger.
- Speaking of Christmas, you gave Conflicted to everyone last year.
- When your friends ask about your favorite authors, instead of Hemmingway, Tolkien, or Kerouac, you get a blank stare when you tell them it’s John ‘Lofty’ Wiseman.
- You know exactly how many Mountain House buckets it takes to make a base for a single bed.
- You don’t stock up on milk. You get an actual cow.
- Your family doesn’t dare take something from the food stockpile without marking it off the list.
- Your kids know how to don a gas mask in 30 seconds.
- It’s not laser tag or paintball…it’s tactical training.
- Everyone in your survival group carries the same firearm so that ammo is standardized.
- You have non-electric versions of appliances like wheat grinders, washing machines, and coffee makers.
- You yell at the TV every time a commercial for Doomsday Preppers comes on. Oh. Wait. You don’t have a TV. But if you did, you’d yell, because you know how positively ridiculous and unrealistic that show is.
- Your family is no longer surprised when you announce, “Hey, we’re going to learn how to make (insert anything here)!”
- You have more how-to books stored on hard-drives than most public libraries have on the bookshelves.
- Your children have a plan to bug out from school.
- Alternatively, you homeschool and bugging out is part of the curriculum.
- You have more than three ways to cook dinner if the power goes out: a woodstove, a barbecue, a sun oven, a fire-pit, and/or a volcano stove.
- First Blood and Red Dawn are basic training films for your family.
- You have long since accepted the idea that if you’re not on someone’s list, you’re probably not doing it right.
- Your 7 year old knows Morse Code.
- You’re secretly disappointed when the electricity comes back on after only a few minutes.
- You know more ways to make a homemade knife than the entire population of your local prison combined.
- You don’t just rotate food, you rotate ammo.
- You know the distance from your door to your front gate is precisely 207 yards.
- Moving to a new house is no longer “moving”, but “strategic relocation“.
- You have mapped out at least 3 different routes by car and 2 different routes on foot to get to your bug-out location.
- You know the difference between “Tyvek” and “Tychem” suits, and in which instance they should be used.
- Ditto the finer points of N-95 vs. N-100 masks.
- You watch The Walking Dead in order to critique their survival tactics. (And you were secretly delighted to see Beth building a fire in a Dakota pit.)
- Speaking of fire, you can start one in at least 3 different ways, and you always carry a lighter, a fresnel lens, and a magnesium firestarter.
- You have two (or more) of everything important, well, because “one is none.”
- You have a decoy food supply.
- Your kids think it’s a fun game to see who can find the most potential weapons in a room.
- Even your dog has a bug out bag – which she carries herself.
- You have elected NOT to purchase greater armament, because you plan on upgrading with your future assailant’s weaponry.
- Your EDC includes a knife, firearm w/extra mag, flashlight, mylar blanket, Chapstick, and an ounce of silver — and that’s just for when you’re walking the dog.
- The trunk of your car has enough supplies to carry you through an entire week during a major blizzard.
- One criterion for your new winter coat is that it fits over your body armor.
Can you relate? What are some other signs you might be a “crazy prepper”?
I can relate even though I was laughing at some of them! Great article! I shared it with my Facebook friends. I guess I’ll just take my crazy prepper badge now!
As a US military veteran and servant of this countries liberty, to say that a prepper is crazy is ludicrous. We are informed citizens protecting our families for worst case scenarios. What a foolish and poor list to make on a site that seems to have some established credibility.
I hope no one is ignorant enough to accept this “freelance writer” and their writing as something true or significant.
This is probably a CIA shill. They have teams of people who spend all day on blogs, facebook, and other internet sites scoping and snooping for crazies aka educated citizens with knowledge and credibility to back up their reasoning.
Shame on this writer and this post for existing and not being removed.
This was intended to be humor, not to be insulting. Sometimes in this world we live in, it’s nice to laugh in solidarity with others who view things the way we do. Obviously I take preparedness seriously, otherwise I wouldn’t spend 40 hours a week writing about it.
I’m very sorry you were offended. I hope you have a good day.
I think it was satirical…. I am sure that the Lady meant no harm and was poking fun at the entire denial of what has become to be “normal”. I thought is was really funny. But “I ain’t right in the mind”, as the mainstream thinks 🙂 I am glad of that. The popular concept of “Normal” is really not that normal. I see it as like navigation. The first step in plotting a course is to fix your position. If you have no idea of where you are you have no idea of where you are going.
All the “normal” think they know but they did not know their position when they began their journey…. Lost!
Just my observation of course 🙂
Thanks for your service, by the way.
We are not enemies but folks of differing life experiences that hear our Creator’s call to make sure we have what our families need. Sometimes we do not speak in the same words but our meaning may be the same if we allow some space to put ourselves in the speakers shoes.
My motto is: “Always remember to laugh at yourself”. Otherwise we get way, way too serious.
Wow…lighten up. Is it YOU who may be the government shill?
In this case, im absolutely insane.
Well I passed insane a long damned time back 🙂 Actually call it crazy, nor insane. Crazy is the minds toll for not passing the insane boundary. Its what keeps us succumbing to the insanity of the social construct.
It is simply amazing that some folk think they can merely pass a law and circumvent nature. Makes about as much sense as passing a law to repeal gravity. And yell bloody murder when some questions their enlightened observation. Hell centuries of proof are out there to look at but all of a sudden painting tyranny a different color or sugar coating it makes it a swell idea…. beyond stupid I say.
Your son decided after 5 years of public skool and simultaneously listening to prepper radio that he was dropping out of Grade 8 and taking up apprenticeships. One on an oyster lease in an Inlet where Fuku wont hit for 100 years, 2 with a welder who his dad just gifted with a combo mig/tig/stick welder (I don”t even know that those mean…but my son will) to pay for his apprenticeship 3 a weekly work schedule with 2 reknowned Indian (First nations blah blah)) carvers and 4 Signing up for martial arts classes. This may look funny I do not know how to use ithings.
I gave solar/rechargeable flashlights to two family members last Christmas. Whether it was lost on them, I don’t know, but I thought I was being caring.
As for a few other points, well, this is embarrassing…:D
It’s funny cus it’s true! I feel inadequate when I come across the items that don’t apply to me. Great. Now I’ve got to get a cow.
One more….you know how to use a still
Oh Yeah!!!!1 Got a hundred year old recipe. We hail from Kentucky, old family tradition.
numbers 28 and 31 are me,,,
to 31 I already have range cards for all my toys based on markers on the property,,,
Thanks Daisy, Now I know Im insane ;o)
Were our ancestors “preppers” ? NO..of course they were not, there was no such word. It was a way of life, and a very good way of life. Criminalizing my heritage is in itself a crime. To be labeled “crazy” for living as one sees fit is an outrage.
This traditional way of life is now almost illegal.
I will never align myself with “preppers” because the very creation of the term, and it’s followers is a way to profile people who are not willing to become dependent on the State.
I have, and have always tried to learn to do things the way my Grandparents, and their Grandparents on into antiquity did things. It’s my choice how to conduct my life in matters of food, shelter etc…. No one else has the authority to tell me what is good or not good for me.
I would suggest all of you get off the bandwagon to segregate a way of life that is God given, and expected.
If living a Traditional lifestyle is outlawed…so be it.
… you grow tobacco and do not smoke!
… you grow your own sugar beets.
… you knock on strangers doors to ask for apple tree cuttings.
… you realize that being a prepper in the far north is just
The best prep I ever made was my husband.
“best prep..was my husband” ~laughing~
yeah to that one…I’m the keeper of the garden, larder & guns but the partner is the macguyver of literally everything else. I try very hard with the building/tools/mechanical/first aid etc. etc. but I don’t have the natural talent he does. But he’d starve to death without me so I guess it’s an even trade 😉
Learned something new: I had to look up “Dakota fire pit”. Now to practice with it next spring. One addition is to know how to build a cinder block ‘rocket’ stove. see on YouTube.
I scrounged some old gas stove pot holders to put on top of the cinder blocks to hold pots & pans.
~laughing~ yes to rocket stove. Or another sign: you collect no. 10 cans (you can do SO much with a nice clean can), large pickle jars, and food grade plastic buckets from work.
The title says these are 45 MORE signs, where are the original 30?
THESE ARE GREAT!!!
These are good.
…..when you realize your freeze dried food has a longer expiration date than you do.
Reply to Goofy Granny…..it does take a lot of pressure off us older folks……we don’t have to worry about how we will eat in 20 years…..heck by then we will pushing up daisies…..or if our kids are real preppers they will bury us in the compost pile….
You might be a red-neck if you? Oh sorry, wrong blog.
46. You know how to make bows out of skis, arrows out of golf clubs, can spin and weave your own threads and cloth as well as make your own candles and soap out of the fat that comes from your butchered animals and you know your way around a forge in case you need to make other weapons and tools besides just a gun and ammo. Guns are nice but what happens when you run out of bullets and shells? Arrows can be reused as soon as they are recovered.
Hell yeah! its our cultural roots… I demand my right to practice the ways of my ancestors….
That will make the liberals insane for sure… We are Viking Scotts Irish and a bit of Cherokee Indian. That poses an interesting set of parameters don’t you think???
High Carbon hand forged swords differentially tempered with mar quenched full tangs, 7, War hammers 2, spears 4, axes, (battle type) 5, cross bow re-curve bow, compound bow 2, sling 4 chain mail 2, hauberks and coifs… working on the helmets 🙂 Grandpa was black smith and I acquired my tools some time ago, mom’s folk were subsistence farmers in Kentucky-grandpa plowed with horses. Grandma made soap in the iron kettle and I churned butter for her after we brought the milk up from milking the cow for about 4 or 5 days. Took a bit to collect enough cream for a batch of butter… Sweet whipped cream on chilled Black Berries…. Yum!
So why have we gotten away from that type of life in the so called modern world??? That is truly insanity by definition. We have walked this way so many times in human history. What in God’s name were we thinking???
#43 rang a bell …except I slip my kids an oz when they go back to the city, after they visit us…They think I’m a prepper, and I tell them they may need it, but it is really a reason for them to keep coming to visit us.
Instead of wrapping his Christmas presents, my brother stuffed them into 50cal ammo cans. Can you imagine what the tree looked like?
You have, or are seriously considering, buying an old apmored personell carrier to turn into your RV.
Too funny; I didnt know what it was called, but I have built “Dakota fires” because that is what the plains Indians used so they wouldnt be spotted on the open range. Mom was a big Indian fan in the early 70’s and I learned many of their survival skills as a kid.
Until the American People learn the following this oppression will continue:
There is no government, there is only a massive spider’s web of de facto fraudulent ‘corporations’ all interlinked from federal, state, county, parish, city and townships.
We have not had any lawful Constitutional government since and before 1933.
I must stress how important it is to understand what has occurred since 1933, a ‘corporation’ has absolutely no lawful authority, jurisdiction, or interstate nexus to enforce, regulate or penalize anyone for anything ever.
Again, there is NO GOVERNMENT, of, by, or for We The People.
There is only:
THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA INCORPORATED aka USA Inc., and its over 185,000 franchisees or sub-corporations that have been fraudulently masquerading as our sovereign constitutional governing body at the federal to township level.
There was a secretive and covert coup, and manipulated bankruptcy that took place behind closed doors in 1933, that placed our nation into the hands of the Wall Street/London City international banksters. These private banksters stole all national assets, infrastructure and collateralized these holding to pay-off all past, present and future debts for their new corporation, USA Inc.
This of course, was never allowed to be exposed to the American People, only many decades later is this horrific fraud and deception finally coming to the light of day. The entire coup is hidden in Congressional Records, and dusty volumes of law books, that the American People never see.
America, has been placed under the control of the United Nations pursuant to the Geneva Convention of 1938, and numerous international treaties which, usurp any Constitutional Law.
This is how these criminals and traitors are able to justify their ‘international’ unlawful policies being foisted on the states and counties.
Few realize that since 1933, all titles to land are ‘Fee Simple’ titles, which means you only ‘rent’ the land, you never lawfully own it. Even if you hold the Deed. The land was collateralized and used to pay-off debt owed to the banksters.
All land and people have been hypothecated as security to Wall Street and London City, England.
(Hypothecate means to securitize without delivery)
In other words, ‘We The Useless Eaters’ are bonded economic slaves ‘allowed’ to roam around the sheep pen.
The court system is completely corrupt and is also a private foreign owned off-shore corporation. Anytime you walk into a courtroom, you are now on foreign corporate property, managed through BAR Incorporated, for Crown Corporation, founded in the middle-ages by the Nights Templar for, the wealthiest, oldest and largest corporation on the planet … Vatican Incorporated.
Understand, are court system in Amerika, is owned and controlled from the middle-court of Inns at the Financial District of London City, England, and NOT in Washington D.C., which is yet another private foreign owned off-shore corporation.
All courts have DUNS #’s, through Duns and Bradstreet, and are traded daily on the NYSE, as corporations.
All law enforcement departments from federal to state are corporations also and are traded on the NYSE daily.
Are you beginning to realize that everything you have ever been taught or assumed is a complete lie, and fabrication?
You had better.
I have just scratched the surface here. It would require a huge book of volumes more to expose all I have uncovered after 35 years of legal research that has been kept hidden from the public regarding how our subjugated and enslaved nation has been destroyed by the criminals in power.
My journey for truth and knowledge truly began when I was fired from CBS Nightly News With Dan Rather, for attempting expose all the lies, fraud and cover-ups regarding the lead-up to 9/11 during the Iraq invasion by Bush Sr., in the early 90’s.
I have been researching full-time ever since in an attempt to bring all the deception to light.
My AffinityNetNews site has long-since been shut-down and red-flagged by the criminals in power. My computers have been destroyed over the years, I been threatened and followed for many years. so I post where and when I can.
WWIII, began on 9/11/2001, when the World Trade Center was attacked by criminal elements within our own CIA, MI6, Nights of Malta, Jesuit Order, Mossad, and the Rothschild/Rockefeller international banking/military criminal cartel, in connection with the House of Saud et el.
We are at war, with the psychopathic Satanic ruling elite that have a vise-grip control over our planet. What you do not know, can and will hurt you. Denial, apathy, and blindness will not protect you from the harsh reality we are living in.
Only knowledge, wisdom and spiritual awareness will set you free.
Research: ‘America Is A Coorporation’.
BY OUR SILENCE, IGNORANCE AND APATHY WE ALLOW
No offense but if you direct your efforts to assisting others with preparations you will receive a just reward, that of helping God’s Friends to be ready.
I honor your efforts but there comes a time when the work for preparation needs to go forward and the past keeps us bound to it in wrath. I have similar experiences. We just have to do what is necessary. that is where you will find peace in the turmoil of the world.
God Bless Brother, and thank you for your efforts.
-You changed your homepage from MSN (or any other propaganda media) to Infowars (which is where I got the link to this list and website, thank you)
-Your friend asks “Do you have enough bullets?”, then you both laugh because you know you can never have enough.
-You know that Falling Skies has better idea for post apocoliptic survival than The Walking Dead or Z Nation but you still watch them all just in case
-When family and friends compliment your garden, you tell them you’re “just practicing”
Ooops, I resemble that remark 🙂
Don’t piss off the Almighty by being too stupid to prepare and die for lack of shooting back. 🙂 I don’t think God is partial to Dumb Azzes. He doesn’t seem to pull their sorry butts out of the fire too often.
Well that is what I was told. Because if you are not shooting you should be reloading and if you are not reloading you should be moving and if you are moving you should be shooting…. Well I guess you get my point :).
Not to offend just my Coyote sense of humor….
Oh Yeah, almost forgot God Bless Texas…
Got cousins in that neck of the woods, good place. My prayers to all of the People who hear the small still voice telling them to prepare.
They say that God is partial to children and fools. Guess I am a bit to old to be child 🙂
Here is hoping that He gets our attention so we don’t let our foolishness get in the way of remembering to be His friend and His children.
…you bookmarked The Organic Prepper website as soon as you found it
Your junior high schooler knows the meaning and definition of OPSEC.
Ooops. I know this was satirical but I’m guilty on #22, #24, #41, and #5.
Laughed my way through the list while nodding my head on most. I understand those who don’t prep will find this list horrifying or maybe a list of things to justify their opinions of us. Those who do as we do but see it as some gloom & doom necessity will miss the humor as well. We’ve had our OJT times when snow & ice storms have knocked out power for a week at a time–we learned from those episodes. And now we prep for what may come in addition to those storms that will most assuredly get here. While I identified with most items on the list, my wife’s would have to be #28– she loves the power failures and sulks a bit when the lights come back on.