I’m a big believer in the importance of attitude. I consider it to be one of my most important portable preps, right up there with my brain. In this article, I’m going to share a common trap of thinking that could cause problems in our slow-burning SHTF that we live in today, but also in an all-out grab your BOB SHTF.
It’s All or Nothing
Yeah, that’s what I’m talkin’ about: All or nothing thinking. It can freeze you, reduce your happiness, reinforce relentless perfectionism and suck the joy out of life. Technically speaking, it’s a cognitive distortion.
By definition, all-or-nothing thinking sees only the extremes. The glass isn’t half empty or half full: it’s gotta be full all the time or you’re a total failure, or it’s seen as having been empty for your whole darn life, and that’s never going to change.
Why Does Thought Matter?
We are what we think. Through decades of meditation, if there is one benefit that I have gained, it is that I have learned to take responsibility for what is in my mind. Yes, every thought. If your mind is full of negativity, you are growing more brain pathways in that direction.
There is hope if someone has a tendency toward negative thinking. We now know that the brain can change and literally rewire itself in a new direction. Dr. David Hanscom emphasizes that we have a choice each and every day: to stay in old, painful ruts of repeated thoughts or lift ourselves out of that and be who we want to be each and every day.
Anyone reading this is like me, wanting to be as prepared as possible for whatever comes my way. I’m going to share a few thought-traps related to prepping and then some very basic things that someone can do to shift their thinking and get going when it’s most needed.
Thought Trap #1: My Preparedness Is My Gear
When concerned about the apocalypse, it can be easy to focus on gear.
There is a feeling of urgency that goes along with this: “If I have this firearm, with all that stopping power, then I will be safe and therefore I am safe now.” The danger of all-or-nothing thinking in this scenario is to focus only on the stuff you have. When a new item becomes available, you will need that, too. The feeling of missing out could lead to feeling like “I’m not prepared if I don’t have X.” or “We won’t make it if we don’t have Y at our bug out location.”
What would happen if you were forced to run with only the clothes on your back? All or nothing thinking might lead you to conclude, “I won’t make it!” But that is right when you need a solid mind more than you ever have in your life.
Thought Trap #2: Hell in a Handbasket
I am the first one to admit that, yeah, things pretty much sucked during the pandemic and they haven’t exactly been great since. Another home on my road was condemned this week. Folks already living in poverty were forced to move in with relatives for now. Double-income families with children in our area are now using food banks.
However, looking only at the negatives day in and day out will reinforce those brain pathways I was talking about earlier. In this slow rolling SHTF or a full-on one, if you only think you’re going to hell in a handbasket day in and day out, you aren’t helping your brain solve the problems in front of you. In fact, you’re harming your resiliency. Hopelessness could lead to major depression right when you need your mental health the most.
Thought Trap #3: I Know Better Than…Well….Everyone!
In this form of all-or-nothing thinking, you know it all and the rest of the plebes know, well, near to nothing. You may fit this description if you find yourself posting smug comments that reference your superior knowledge and/or gear.
If you know a lot more than others, I am happy for you! The thought trap here is that being overly confident in your knowledge may mean that you miss something that could help you. That old woman who was selling cabbages by the roadside that you ignored? If you had talked to her for a while and listened, you might have found out about those caves in the hills that her father took her to when she was young. She also has a huge herb garden and grows two herbs known for stopping bleeding.
Information can come from varied sources. It’s great to be proud of your preps and resources. Are yours balanced with a listening attitude?
Some Tips on the Path
There are many ways to address all-or-nothing thinking.
In terms of placing an emphasis on gear to the exclusion of other things, sitting down to do an honest assessment of your strengths and weaknesses in all areas of preparedness could help. What areas could you improve to support a no-gear scenario? Is there some knowledge that you could gain that would help you feel more confident no matter what the situation you face? This article has some interesting thoughts.
In terms of feeling frozen into inaction by the overwhelming Hell-in-a-Handbasket feeling, I use a couple of approaches regularly. When I feel that everything is too big and I can’t do anything, I set my timer for 15 minutes and go out to do 15 minutes of something. By the time I’ve done 15 minutes, I almost ALWAYS feel like I can do more. It’s getting past that feeling of overwhelm that I need.
Because these are tough times, I also work on my gratitude daily, focusing on what IS working in my life and what IS wonderful about today. That keeps my neural pathways growing in the right direction. Resiliency is the balm of SHTF.
Finally, in terms of feeling that I know it all, whenever I start to get a bit too big for my britches, I love to talk to elders. They know stuff. They’ve lived through things I can’t imagine. I listen and ask questions.
I used to have difficulty admitting that I made mistakes or didn’t know something. I now am able to admit it and move on. When I am dismissive of a person and what they do or don’t know, I challenge myself to listen. By challenging my preconceptions, I have often learned valuable lessons. Some people don’t blow their own horns, but they know a sh*tload of stuff.
The Middle Way
All-or-nothing thinking is a natural part of life, but we want to be aware of it so that it doesn’t handicap our preparedness. Can you relate to any of the thought traps listed? Do you have one you have seen in yourself or the preparedness community that you can share with us? Please tell us in the comments section.
About Rowan
Rowan O’Malley is a fourth-generation Irish American who loves all things green: plants (especially shamrocks), trees, herbs, and weeds! She challenges herself daily to live her best life and to be as fit, healthy, and prepared as possible.
6 Responses
This is a good article. I was never much bothered by the pandemic nonsense. I live in a place were most eveyone ignored it and just got on with life– but we could. Life hasn’t sucked since the pandemic anymore than it ever does.
My Dad was a founder of the electronic industry as we know it today. As a kid we had guys on the level of Einstein, Edison, Bell, and all the other world changing individuals – routinely sitting around our dinner table. At the time it seemed normal- I was a kid. Our little town only had 3 nice restaurants so when these guys were in town for the week, Thursday dinner was at our house. They liked being in a home as they all traveled a lot. We all sat around the dining table and conversed. Some of my Dad’s inventions are still in everyday use. He was world famous in his field. When you are always around genuis level intellects (mother was one, too) you don’t realize what a gift it is. You would never know the level of their intellect to just meet them.
Dad lived to say that he thought the internet would be the death of humanity. Nobody disagrees. The world really started changing when that first cable went under the sea from N. America to Europe. Instant communication. Now it is absurd. There is NO time to make considered decisions. Everything is instant…and “instant” in the hands of an idiot (most of us) or those with evil intent is not a good thing.
If you prep well for one thing, it pretty much covers everything. Do your basic prep to cover however much time you can afford or have room, etc…then add a few tweaks like potassium iodide, or fish antibiotics…well you get the idea. Buy everything on sale over time & you have pretty cheap food. Then CHOOSE JOY. That’s it. Time is our most precious “possession.” If you waste it, you have wasted your life.
Great advice.
Thanks for this great post Rowan. I’m all or nothing thinker for sure. My hubby keeps telling me to enjoy life and stop being laser focused on prepping and end times, because I have no control over it. I think that’s my issue, having to maintain control over everything. And definitely not trusting , especially government, big pharma, doctors hospitals. 😂 the list goes on. I’m going to take a step back and just breathe.
Hi, TexasAntigone. I totally get that. By nature, I’m the perfectionist’s perfectionist. For example, if the receiver of a wall-mounted phone was even a bit askew, I’d adjust it to where it seemed to be perfectly vertical.
It wasn’t until my late 40s that I was able to become an ordinary perfectionist (?), largely as a result of a lot of reading on metaphysics, which convinced me that life is just one step of a long, possibly infinite journey. I still get angry or upset (for which some of the stimuli have been discussed at this website) more than probably would be desirable, but still it’s progress. (I’m 65.)
The more I learn, the more I realize how little I know.
Yes, I have gear. Yes, I have my preps. But, I also know that I could survive, at least in the short term, with my EDC…or at least that’s what I tell myself.
Buying things is easy, it’s the training that goes with it that’s hard. When I think that everything is about to blow up, I look at WW2 pictures of German cities in 1945. The destruction of large cosmopolitan, modern cities never ceases to keep me from going down the rabbit hole.